Monthly Archives: November 2016

Meeting – Tuesday 22nd November

Another top meeting on a somewhat drizzly Tuesday night. We had twelve members in attendance and five pieces in the box.

Eric presented the final section of a two-part story called ‘Mr Nobody’. Lots of praise here for the great premise, ambiguity, and the POV’s quirky habits (I’m pretty sure we’ve all wanted to squeeze a few heads on the bus!). Some questions over whether there is enough at stake for our protagonist and just what his motivation is in the last third of the story. Calls for a bit more sympathy for the protagonist and some Patrick Batemen type carnage in the final act.

Mark presented the first part of ‘Adapt or Die 22’, a rags-to-riches story of a retired slasher coming back for one final kill. Members enjoyed the crisp prose, dark humour, and celebrity slasher POV. Some pressing questions: Who is paying him for all of this, and why is it legal!? Some members also wondered whether the back and forth between the memoir and the chase scene slowed the pace a little too much. Calls to keep the POV steady and to turn Marisa’s harrowing chase into a twitter feed!

Kate presented the first part of a quest fantasy novella called ‘Shaman’. Some Comparisons drawn to the South American book, Something of the deer. Members were fully on board with the non-western fantasy setting and gender swapping shamans. Praise for the great world-building, and brilliant twists on the old folk-tale betrothal story. Some questions over whether there is a bit too much information crammed into this first part: should this be the first 3-4 chapters rather than the first 3-4 thousand words? Also, where about is this set, and what is going on in that spirit journey? Calls for a bit more emotion from our POV and her betrothed, more visual descriptions of the world, and to make the details of the spirit journey a little more clear cut.

Javier presented the first part of his horror piece called ‘The Haunting Handbook’. Members enjoyed the Gothic horror styling of this piece (even those who aren’t usually fans of the style!). Praise for the olde English vibe and the slow build horror elements in this piece. Some questions raise around the monster encounter: what does the Barghest actually look like, and why does it just stand there? Also, do we need a preface, a poem and a foreword? Calls for more description of the place (what are the sights, sounds and smells of this gloomy 19th Century York), a little more detail on the Barghest, and, of course: more more more.

Chris presented ‘Itchy throat’, a hairy little body-horror piece you should definitely avoid showing to your mum. We unfortunately had no time for crits in the session, so we went across to Common where all were agreed that it was thoroughly disgusting.

That’s all for this time. Next meeting December 14th.

Pip pip!

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Wednesday Meeting: 9th November

We had a big turnout this week and only got through four of the five pieces.

Also, consider this your bi-monthly reminder that we are accepting submissions for our next Anthology. We have yet to receive any submissions from group members so get scribbling!

Chris:

Chris presented a flash piece called luck of the draw.

  • There were lots of positive comments about the strong philosophical edge in the piece.
  • The group seemed to be split on length. Does it need to be longer or does it work as flash?
  • Some confusion over what the setting was. Some members mistakenly believed it was a casino rather than a luck mine.
  • A few questions over the info-dumpy bit at the end.
  • Had all the usual positives of a strong voice, very readable and slick dialogue.

the-luck-factory

Ezeiyoke:

Ezeiyoke presented the start of a piece called ‘Guardian’.

  • Lots of nice comments about the folkloric some comments over the nice imagery.
  • Some confusion over the language. Large sentences and long paragraphs seemed a bit long and clunky for some.
  • Some comments that the king’s sexual arousal scene came out of nowhere. Others found this to be a nice twist.
  • Some comments that there were too many descriptions of the protag looking towards his wife.

king

Luke

Luke presented the first part of a novelette called ‘All The Things That End’.

  • Lots of comments about the prologue with the verdict edging towards it not being necessary. Can we just start in the stable?
  • Lots of positive comments about the world and believable setting.
  • Some questions over the Western elements. Does it sometimes veer towards Cliché? Differing opinions on this.
  • Some nice comments about the quality of the dialogue.

cowboy

Tom:

Tom presented another chapter from his novel An End To Forever

  • Lots of praise for the quality of writing in this piece. Some top notch world building as usual.
  • The array of different creatures is great fun.
  • Some questions over the amount of characters and the flitting between different worlds. Some comments that only reading a couple of chapters a month means it is hard to keep track of everything.
  • Some call’s for the buildings and the land to be made more vivid. Some found the large wonderful structures difficult to picture.

half-bird-half-human

We all nipped off to the pub afterwards for a few slugs of grog and a chat. Topics of conversation centred around the election across the pond (you know? The one that wasn’t at all in the news?).

Next meeting is Tuesday the 22nd November. See you there!

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