We had a big old turnout this week with four pieces to get through. It was a pleasure to welcome Ezeiyoke and Marc to their first meeting. It’s great to see our little (or now not so little) group continue to grow.
Chris presented the second part of his novel the knight of never rest:
Like the previous chapter, I think everyone really enjoyed this piece. There were lots of positive comments about the setting, and the dialogue was a real pleasure to read. There was a bit of confusion around whether the protagonist already knew the witch or not. Perhaps the author could make this a bit clearer? As with previous chapters, there were some calls for the language to be more uniform. At times the language feels very old world, where at others it felt quite modern.
Everyone is looking forward to the next chapter!
Hans presented the first part of a novel called Boys.
I think everyone enjoyed the narrative here, and there was praise for the interesting ideas on show. Most group members liked the idea of a government death department (although if it was really a department it was perhaps giving away a little too much). Some found the prose a little too cinematic, especially the chase/chess scene. This kind of approach would be great for a film, but it didn’t quite hit the mark here. There were some calls for more visualisation of the surroundings and calls for more characterization.
Tom presented the second chapter of a piece called The Fabled Winds.
I think everyone enjoyed the descriptions in this piece. The world building came across as fantastical and sophisticated, while the flora and fauna of the planet showed great creativity on the author’s part. There were some questions over how clear the protagonist’s thought processes were when she was in a life or death situation, and some felt that the injury was a little too serious for her to be moving around as freely as she was. A few members wanted to see a more authentic narrative voice, and there were some comments that piece was a little ‘told’ at times.
Everyone is looking forward to seeing what other wonders await in the next chapter.
Bryn presented the second part of a short story called An End To Forever
Lots of positive comments for the quality of the prose in this piece. There were some fantastic turns of phrase that really showcased the author’s talents. Some members felt that the story felt like two ideas crunched together. Does the first half fit with the second half? There were a few comments that the fight scene went on a bit long, and there were a few too many nameless meatshields.
Afterwards, we scooted off to the pub for a spot of libation and a chinwag.
Remember, we are currently accepting submissions for our next anthology REVOLUTIONS 2, so get writing and get submitting people!