Tuesday 28th June

Another great meeting last week with 11 members and five pieces critted (that must be some sort of record!


Arthur presented a witty short story called ‘RTS’ that many members felt was reminiscent of a Douglas Adams like jaunt into space. There was much praise for the ideas in this piece: hoovering up zombies to put them on the moon was a clear hit, though members were split on the final pun. Some felt the piece was telling, not showing too much at the moment. There were also some questions about the general logic of the piece and motives of the characters; however, given the humourous nature and length, most were agreed that these points didn’t hamper the piece.




Eliza presented the first half of a short story called ‘More than one zodiac in highschool

There was a great deal of praise for the writing and characterisation here, especially the writing of Amy’s mum. Members also enjoyed the foreshadowing with Tegan’s drawings, Amy’s relationship with Long, and the dark tone of the piece. Some members were worried that the piece was a little too reminiscent of Phillip Pullman. The general consensus, though, was that the story could be made different enough not for this to be a problem, provided the spirit animal concept was made clearer.


Kate presented the first part of a short story called ‘The Sad Bird’, which turned out to be a Russian folk-law meets noir detective story, with some definite cosmic horror vibes.

There was much to praise here amongst both the writing style and the very original ideas. Members had some questions over just how much under the protagonist was  under the creature’s spell and that they would be more shocked to discover such a creature exists. Some members also felt that the reveal that the client is a magical creature could be held back longer for effect. Also, a different profession for the protagonist than a Private Eye might be better. Some further calls to convert the narrative summary into dialogue. But so far everyone is enjoying this.

Graeme presented a short piece called ‘She’s Behind You’. Some members found this reminiscent of Donnie Darko, and all were in agreement that this was a very disturbing and creepy read, and in that respect entirely successful. Much praise for the ambiguity, clipped style, and use of the second person in this piece, and especially for the cold and distant voice of the POV. Some questions raised over why not every character has a ‘shadow’, and what goes on in the woods. Is our POV disturbed, or does he go through with the act? Again, though, the ambiguity was generally enjoyed by most members.




Finally James presented a short piece called ‘Surfing Zombies’, which turned out to be a punchy read about a mysterious trashy video from the early 90s. All members agreed that the thought of zombies in speedos is utterly horrifying Praise for the hook and intriguing plot and the nods to 80s and 90s culture. Some members found the piece reminiscent of ‘the Ring’. Others raised questions about the rather sudden ending: Is he going to watch it again? Is it a curse? Will it affect our POV? Could the watching of the tape come parallel to other events in our POV’s life perhaps (we watched this crazy movie at a house party and…)? Calls for a bit more of a twist and a bit more showing rather than telling. Cowabunga!




That’s all from us for now. Our next meeting is on Wednesday the 13t, 7pm at MadLab. See you there dudes/dudettes!

1 Comment

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One response to “Tuesday 28th June

  1. I love the picture for my one.

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